Search - Various Artists :: Ultimate 80's Box

A new low (even for Cleopatra) in insulting commercialism!

F P Cassini | Ibogaine, Montevideo | 10/21/2009

(2 out of 5 stars)

"BEWARE- this 3cd "box" is a strange beast! First of all, as of October 20, 2009, there are 2 listings for this silly bargain bin grab bag on Amazon: one is listed as being on the Big Eye Music label, and is currently selling for $[...] new or 1 penny more if you prefer it used. (always makes me chuckle.) The other listing is for an apparently earlier pressing on lowbrow Cleopatra (it's actually on Hypnotic, Cleopatra's cheesy rave/techno imprint.) This listing is currently at $[...] used, $[...] new. What a deal! Well, that depends on your idea of a deal.



All this 90s music is on 3 individual jewel cased CDs that have absolutely nothing to do with each other, other than being randomly collected together in a standard cardboard slipcase with the impersonal, cheesy graphic you see above.



DISK ONE: a compilation entitled "The World's Greatest Club Collection! Remixed Smash Hits" compiled by genius boy wunderkind Brian Perera (Cleopatra founder and head) himself! There's nothing "80s" about this disk besides the slight nods towards the original songs that are raped, i mean 'remixed', cheesy 90s club style.



DISK TWO: Lest you thought this was going to be just another triple cd comp, here's a curve ball- disc number two of THE ULTIMATE 80s BOX is Heaven 17's 1996 non-charting, non-prophetic 'comeback', "Bigger Than America"! One can only imagine the late night stimulant fueled corporate meeting in the upstairs lounge at Cleopatra during which they pondered how to get rid of the towering pallets of "Bigger Than America" crowding the pool table in the warehouse. "Designing Heaven" (1996) and "We Blame Love" (1997) were the singles from the album, which has 2 bonus mixes of "Designing Heaven" appended: the Meis Van Der Rohe Mix (Giorgio Moroder's Subteranean 12") and the Den Hemmel Designen remix.



DISK THREE: We conclude the THE ULTIMATE 80s BOX with of fitting dose of the kind of crass, disposable, needless "tribute" albums Cleopatra has laughed all the way to the bank with: "TRANCE LEAGUE Express: A Trance Tribute to The Human League." What can be said of such drab non-tongue-in-cheek technosynth-Mantovani muzak? I was hoping there would be at least one killer cover; it seems Human League songs could easily lend themselves to sharp, funky reimagining- BUT I WAS WRONG. As always with these projects, it sounds like the programming, sequencing and home engineering challenges were personal accomplishments for the responsible parties, leaving inspired artistry in the trash heap of initial intentions. The artwork was seemingly created by a colorblind 6th grader on her Macintosh SE circa 1987. At least there's one thing 80s-ish about this box set!





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